Curses

Last week a friend emailed me with an urgent question - what does someone really mean when they say "Go to hell". Are they literally judging and damning your life on the spot? Do we go to hell because someone suggest that for us? All of these are really good questions.

Why would someone tell another person to go to hell? For me, the concern is not so much about the existence of hell as a place, as it is our human need to dwell on the negative. To wish evil upon others. That has been a favorite human pastime across all cultures - to curse those whom we are upset with. The dictionary says that a curse is the expression of a wish that misfortune, evil doom, etc. befall a person, group, etc. To me - that is what the term "Go to hell" is a - curse a wish of misfortune.

I don't want to get into the theological implications of cursing another - but I do want to talk about the emotional implications of our evil wishes - for one another and for ourselves.

For quite some time now, I have felt that I am living in hell on earth. Because of the negative things that people have been saying about me. The doubts of my abilities, the criticism of everything that I do, the inability to wish me well - is starting to take its toll on me. I feel a sense of depression that I have not felt in years, and I can't seem to shake no matter how hard I try. Because I grew up in an atmosphere of constant criticism - I am especially sensitive to negativity. That background has also made me a perfectionist - someone who works like hell to avoid the criticism and dislike of others.

As I have grown up, I have looked for ways to be more positive, and to not be so stricken by the evil wishes of others. But the question still remains for me - why are we so comfortable with negativity? Why are we in American culture so insensitive to the effects of our words on others? Why don't we realize that our words hurt and would people just as much as a gunshot? Physical wounds can be mended, and we can witness a physical healing. And yet many of us do not know how to express the pain that we feel from the negativity that others have inflicted on us- and we unknowingly make those words a self fulfilling prophecy. That is the power of a curse - is that you internalize the words and live them out. That emotional pain lives inside of us forever, affecting our choices, our health, our lifestyle. And for many years- we know we are in pain, yet do not even really know where the pain originated. Which means we never heal.

My prayer for the world is that we learn to speak words of peace and not pain. That we support one another instead of always looking at one another as enemies or competitors. That we realize that our words are intended to create, not to curse.

May you release the negativity inflicted on you by life, and replace it with love and peace to pass around to those who need it.

Peace